Our reader thought she was marrying into a wealthy but supportive family. Then HR showed her the email that changed everything. Now she’s questioning the entire relationship and considering her next move.
Read her story to be surprised by how far family dramas can go.
Hello,
I want to share a story that I would never believe if it didn’t happen to me.
So, I make way more money than my fiancé. His wealthy parents suddenly demanded that I quit and be a stay-at-home wife. His mom added that it’s weird when a woman earns more than her husband, and it’ll be humiliating for him.
I said, “Fine, but set up a 40-year trust to guarantee my financial security.” She just smirked and rolled her eyes back.
The next day, HR called me in, and I froze when they showed me the email. It was from my fiancé’s mother. She wrote that I was “mentally unfit to work.” Said I was “hysterical” and “unstable from hormones.” She’s never even seen me cry.
I laughed in disbelief, then pointed out that this was clearly a personal vendetta, not a workplace issue. Thankfully, HR agreed. They classified it as a personal matter with no bearing on my professional performance and dismissed it.
My husband doesn’t know anything, as things have developed too fast. I’m planning to tell him. But I’m questioning myself if it’s worth spending my time on this family at all. I’m sure they won’t stop, and the whole thing is going to get worse. Or I need to do something that would show them I’m not going to bear with it.
Andrea H.
Here is our response:
Hi Andrea,
What happened isn’t just overstepping; it’s very manipulative and calculated. It’s clear that you need to tell your husband right away. Don’t delay this. He needs to hear it from you before anyone else spins the story.
How he reacts will tell you everything about where he stands, whether he’s a partner or a bystander in this mess. From this point, it’d be easier to make a final decision.
Also, this isn’t just family drama. His mother tried to sabotage your job with false claims. It crossed a legal line. Get a professional opinion. You don’t need to take action right away, but it’s good to know what your options are if they keep pushing.
And here are some creative ways to fire back at your possible MIL:
If they want to play with status and power, play smarter. Attend the next family dinner or event dressed confidently, talk casually about your recent wins at work, and let them feel the discomfort of not being able to control you socially.
Send a short, professional response to the mother’s email, copied to your fiancé, saying something like:
“Your message to my employer was both inappropriate and untrue. I hope we can keep future matters respectful and out of each other’s workplaces.”
This draws a clear line and makes it harder for her to pretend nothing happened.
If they were helping with the rehearsal dinner or hosting something at their house, politely cancel it. Say you’ve decided to scale down or handle it differently. This sends a clear message: their behavior has consequences, even if you don’t say it out loud.
You don’t need to play the sweet future daughter-in-law when the respect isn’t mutual.
Take care of yourself.
Editor1